The Cynic
A cynical spin on the news.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Playing the percentages...

I said I would've been happy around 50% and on a quick count I hit 46% so I'm pretty good. Anything under 25% and you're a bad bad person :)

*****

Start with 100%, and take away 1% for everything you've done/that's happened to you on this list. Put the number you are left with in the subject line

EXAMPLE... if you did ONE thing you would put 99%

Smoked
Drank alcohol
Cried when someone died
Been drunk
Had sex
Been to a concert
Given a handjob/gotten a handjob
Given a blowjob/gotten a blowjob
Been verbally sexually harassed
Verbally sexually harassed somebody

Felt someone up and/or been felt up
laughed so hard something came out of your nose
Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before
Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend
Been to promCried at school
Gotten lost in a WalMart or a department store
Went streakingGiven a lap dance
Had someone of the opposite sex in your room
Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over
Slept over at someone of the opposite sex's house

Kissed a stranger
Hugged a stranger
Went scuba diving
Driven a car
Gotten an xray
Hit by a car
Had a party
Done drugs

strip poker
Got paid to strip for someone
Ran away from home
Broken a bone
Eaten sushi
Bought porn
Watched porn
Made porn
Had a crush on someone of the same sex
Been in love

Frenched kissed
Laughed so hard you cried
Cried yourself to sleep
Laughed yourself to sleep
Stabbed yourself
Shot a gun
Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day
Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours
Been online for 9 consecutive hours

Watched an animal die
Watched a person die
Had sex and/or messed around somewhere with at least 1 person present
Pranked somebody
Put somebody in the hospital
Snuck into someone's room and/or your own room after being out
Kissed somebody of the same sex

Dressed punk
Dressed goth
Dressed preppy
Been to a motocross race
Avoided somebody
Been stalked
Stalked someone
Met a celebrity
Played an instrument

Ridden a horse
Cut yourself
Bungee jumped
Ding dong ditched somebody
Been to a wild party
Got caught stealing something
Kicked a guy in the balls
Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend
Went out with your friend's crush

Got arrested
Been pregnant
Babysat
Been to another country
Started your house on fire
Had an encounter with a ghost
Donated your hair to cancer patients
Been asked out by someone that you never thought you'd to be asked out by

Cried over a member of the opposite sex
Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 3 months
Sat on your ass all day
Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself
Had a job
Gotten cut from a sports team
Been called a whore
Danced like a whore

Been mistaken for a celebrity
Been in a car accident
Been told you have beautiful eyes
Been told you have beautiful hair
Raped somebody
Danced in the rain
Been rejected
Walked out of a restaurant without paying
Punched someone/slapped someone

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I take the news
and drag the truth out of it.


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