The Cynic
A cynical spin on the news.
Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Jenna's iPod...

So we've discussed W's musical tastes, let's talk about his daughter...She obviously loves music and occasionally getting on all fours and dry humping at trendy NYC night clubs (seen her around Mudge?) [Page Six]...

Now granted we're going back to my P.S. 41 days, but I will admit that hearing "Da Butt" will make one do some crazy dancing..

Otherwise, it's gotta suck for Barbara to always be referred to as "the other Bush daughter". She's not as attractive...and frankly Jenna provides a better opportunity for the chance that one of my friends from the city will call me at 4 a.m. and claim he banged her in a bathroom...

Now this being said...We know there's a Jenna Bush sex tape out there and once cowboy leaves office this sucker will be leaked and sell...oh...50 million more copies than Paris Hilton's crap..

So now that the image of Jenna freaking some UT PIKE is in your head, I wonder what's on her iPod..

I'm automatically saying "Rump Shaker" by Wreckz-N-Effectz (or however you spell that groups name), you fill in the rest..

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Breaking News!

AP-CA--Britney Spears
Report: Britney Spears is pregnant

LOS ANGELES (AP) - The syndicated television news magazine"Entertainment Tonight" is reporting that pop star Britney Spears is pregnant.

There were no details.

No talent singer and out-of-work dancer spawn kid who was doomed from conception.

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The Pres' iPod

Not surprising that George Bush has a iPod although I wonder how his playlist leak out to the media. [NYT]

His playlist isn't anything to rave about, a few country artists (sorry Dave, no Wade Hayes) and surprisingly he's snagged some tunes from Joni Mitchell and John Fogerty, the latter of whom took part in the Vote for Change concert to boot him out of office...Of course he wouldn't dare put "Fortunate Son" on his playlist, so he chose Centerfield. I'm just Fogerty is proud.

No soul, nothing too daring outside of the Knack. Cameron needs to turn his Republican friends onto some decent music.

Download music? Lord no, he's way too busy to do such remedial tasks.

Mr. Bush, as leader of the free world, does not take the time to download the music himself; that task falls to his personal aide, Blake Gottesman, who buys individual songs and albums.

And more notably he likes artists who can't stand him. I'm surprised I didn't read of any inclusions of Toby Keith (I skimmed the article, it might be in there), which means that even this president can spot a no-talent hack.

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Workout, 8-11-2015

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