The Cynic

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Do I Need a Caretaker...

...every so often I like to assess where my personal life is. Who I see, what they do, how they live, if everything worked out (usually no).

So when I go to the "what they do" section I got this feedback:

Nurse
Nursing student
Dental Hygentist
Physical Therapist
Lawyer
911 Dispatcher
Dentral Hygentist

Skip the lawyer for a second and geez that's a lot of women in the health profession. And when I venture back even farther, I find more nurses and the such. Why is this? Now at first it made sense. I worked the third shift on a job and nurses (and emergency dispatchers) work equally moronic hours so it made for the easiest pairing. Of course I'm more of a 9 10 to 5 3:30 worker these days so I should be able to break out of this trend.

I guess I find comfort in the caretaker types. Isn't that what most men want anyway? Someone to take care of them. I mean we talk about wanting independent women but what we mean is we want women who will work all day AND take care of us. And own all their own shit. Yes, that's independence :)

Labels: Women

posted at 10:26 AM by Corey
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Monday, October 29, 2007

Exercising All Options

I've been crushing on this manager at Enterprise Rent-A-Car recently. During the football season I'm a frequent customer so she's seen me a bit and naturally she's blown away by my boyish good looks and irresistable charm.

Anyway, I try to keep the flirting to a minimum, but I had a golden opportunity today as she checked me in.

Enterprise blondie: So did you head up to Tallahassee this weekend?

Me: Nope, went to Jacksonville.

Enterprise blondie: You went to the game.

Me: Sure did.

Enterprise blondie: You go to the games a lot. Do you have a problem getting tickets.

Me: Nah, I get as many as I need for whichever game I want to go to (total lie, but it sounded good).

Enterprise blondie: Could you get me tickets for the Thanksgiving weekend?

Me: Sure...how many you need?

Enterprise blondie: Two

(SHIT!)

Me: Sure, no problem...who are you taking?

(Please say "sorosity sister")

Enterprise blondie: My boyfriend

(SHIT!)

Me: I can do that...so how long you been dating?

Enterprise blondie: Over a year, he's a big fan too...

Me: Ahhh that's good.

Enterprise blondie: Yup that's not a problem is it?

Me: What your boyfriend?

Enterprise blondie: Yeah...

Me: Nah....I can get around boyfriends....it's husbands that give me trouble. Have a good day.

Labels: Women

posted at 11:35 AM by Corey
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Friday, June 08, 2007

Not Only Does Christmas Come Early...

...But it comes twice!

For your viewing pleasure we have a choice. Either you can enjoy Amanda Beard's Playboy spread until someone demands they take it down (these are NSFW in case you needed a reminder).

Or you can enjoy this image from Paris Hilton's dark day.

Have a good weekend!

Labels: Pop Culture, Sports, Women

posted at 4:40 PM by Corey
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