The Cynic
A cynical spin on the news.
Friday, February 13, 2004

ABC Picks Up Pilots For "No See TV" Night..

The soon-to-be Comcast-owned network has picked up six pilots, including ones by pop tart and reality show hound Jessica Simpson and another one by 80s has-been John Stamos.

Simpson's pilot has her playing Jessica Sampson, an extremely spoiled and annoying girl who says stupid things that frustrate her boyfriend...Rick Lachey.

Less is know about Stamos' pilot except that he's a guy named Jesse who's career is overshadowed by his more successful wife.

"I wonder where he comes up with these ideas," said one naive ABC executive.

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Previously...

Who the Hell Needs Simon When You've Got Mary Jane?

John Kerry: "I'm Not a Player I Just Crush A Lot"

Secret is Out, Hillary IS a Tough Guy

Comcast and Disney: A Deal to Die For...

Veronica Atkins Defends Her Fat-Ass Dead Husband

Breast-less Grammys Draw 26 million Disappointed V...

France Send Religious Apparel the way of Soap..

How much for that Nipple Shield in the Window?

Clark Surrenders; Kerry Gloats

MTV Daytime: Too Toxic for Britney



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