...I haven't been a fan of July...Ever.

Now I should've loved July when I was a kid in New York City because summers in New York are great thanks to baseball, cookouts and amusement parks. However, many good Julys were spent visiting my mother's family in Elloree, South Carolina (which is as exciting as it sounds).

Unfortunately I never really appreciated those times in Elloree, mainly because it was boring as shit and I missed the excitement of the big city. As I got old enough to stop being forced to go to Elloree, I stopped going. Matter of fact I've only been there twice since 1991 -- once for my grandfather's funeral and once for my grandmother's funeral.

Then there's 2004 and Hurricane Charley...followed up by Hurricane Frances...followed up by Hurricane Jeanne.

In all fairness those happened in August and September, but screw it. July sucks!

The heat is another thing. It's HOT AS HELL in Florida in July. Granted it's hot here from like February to November, but July is a new kind of hot, it's like hot that only countries from the "third world" (this includes Texas) feel. Seriously, I know the Devil Rays are the worst baseball team ever at anything, but thank god they play in a dome (even if it's unattractive and outdated)

So July comes to an end and with it I find that the live I have put on hold since mid-May is slowly recovering and recognizing me again.


My Life: Corey....Is that you...it looks like you?


Me: Yes life, it's me.


My Life: You look tired and you need to shave.


Me: Yes yes, I know. I'm very tired, it's been a long last month in a half.


My Life: And you could use a new wardrobe or at least another pair of jeans.


Me: Yes, I haven't been shopping in a while.


My Life: Well nonetheless, it's good to see you again, we need to get together soon and hang out, it's been a long time.


Me: Yeah, no doubt, I've got a little more time now, what have I missed.

My Life: Well your best friend Cesar had a child, Stephen, and he's getting married in September.

Me: Oh really, good for Ces.

My Life: You know you're a groomsman in his wedding.

Me: Really?

My Life: Yeah you'll need to get fitted for a tuxedo soon.

Me: Great...I just love weddings...

My Life: Another one of your best friend's just got engaged and you've actually been on two dates, I had fun while you were thinking about work. You need a haircut and your Ledger Edge isn't speaking to you right now.

Me: Huh? She isn't. What did I do?

My Life: I'm your life, not your conscience.