I tell you, I hate missing a gift horse (BTW I will make tons of excuses of why I didn't take advantage of this).

It's 1:15 AM and I'm finishing up my night at work with a trip to Wal-Mart to pick up generic Christmas stuff (cards, etc.) and on my way it my eye caught a cute girl, not model attractive mind you, but extremely cute while wearing her blue jeans and big ARMY sweatshirt.

I walk by not thinking anything of it because a lot of the cute Florida Southern College chicks go to the Wal-Mart late at night.

Anyway, I walking with an empty cart because I can't find anything I need, I ride back through the health and beauty aisle and see this girl struggling to keep her items in her cart so I do a quick U-turn and:

Corey: Hey, you need this cart?

Cute Redhead: No, really I don't (meanwhile TAMPAX are slipping out of her hands)...

Corey: Of course you do...

Cure Redhead: No...it's just these are slippery and it's late...Thank you very much...You're such a gentleman.

Corey (feeling completely thrown by the sincerety): You're welcome..

GONE...

What the fuck man? I could've gotten a name or a number but the innocence of the "gentleman" comment just killed me. I would've been less of a gentleman if I used that a pickup opportunity right? Besides what self-respecting man tries to talk to a girl in the feminine products aisle?

Anyway, what made me feel worse was that I spent the next 30 minutes walking around with an armful of shit like some douche bag.

Maybe she'll see my face in the paper and drop me an email. I hope.