The Cynic
A cynical spin on the news.
Friday, August 27, 2004

Off Day #3...

Thursday was my third day of five off in a row (which means I go back to work Sunday for all you math experts). For the most part it's been a pretty laid back week: Oatmeal in the morning, some gym time, a few stops at Best Buy, a trip to Celebration to help some friends out, going to Johnny and Christinas for a couple of legitimate meals (which I can't muster the strength to eat on my own).

Anyway, Thursday provided quite a paradox to my week thus far. It was the day of the Ledger's Football 2004 section so I was on pins about that. I had already seen the section and on second viewing I'm just as disappointed in myself as I was in first viewing. It was okay but not as good as I wanted it to be. Not going to get into why I didn't like it, but I didn't. However, like with any day it's a two-hour period that really sticks out.

1:05: [I'm sitting back watching Olympics, reading Maese's blog from Athens] co-worker and friend Rick sends me an IM asking about the party.

Oh shit...I promised the staff a release party for the special section. I forgot. Thanks Rick.

1:07: I quickly cover my tracks by telling Rick it's at 3. After all, 3 sounds good and it gives me two hours. In hindsight I should've said that I was out of bounds, but I called my other co-worker Dick in the morning and he knew I was in town..

1:10: My friend Stephanie wants some...[oh great...nice thought, but the timing wasn't really there]....some help with football pictures....Bah...Not a problem because when I panic I actually need a distraction, you know, to waste time and all.

1:16: I send Steph four photos from the AP Server and get back to thinking about this party. Now mind you I haven't done a damn thing yet, just thinking because if I put my mind to it, it'll come.

1:19: Still thinking.

1:21: Haven't moved yet, it's been 16 minutes since I was informed I had a party.

1:23: Grab the phone book to search for the number to the closest Publix. Publix is, as some of you know, the greatest supermarker EVER at ANYTHING.

1:25: Find the Publix number.

1:28: Still staring at the Publix number.

1:30: It's rude to call the deli and tell them to hurry up with an order and since I'm five minutes from two stores, I can just drive there.

1:38: At the Publix on Southgate. Run into the Deli and talk to the nice lady (we'll call her Flo). "Okay Flo, I need to do a party in an hour." Flo babbles for a while and the only phrase I understand is "We can do ringleaders quickly" and something about iced tea. A ringleader is a big circular sandwich and quite a deal for $15. So I order a couple of turkey rings, a salad (since everyone in sports is on the damn South Beach) and a couple boxes of chicken wings.

1:50: Order is in so I run home and grab a shower.

2:10: Shower is done. So I dry off and get dressed. Also check my email again. Oooo, K-Street came out on DVD? I need to grab that one.

2:20: Time to head back to Publix because I have to go through two school zones to get there.

2:30: Travelling down Oak St. and there's a traffic jam? DOWN OAK??! It's a side street!! Thankfully Corey has unmatched skills as a secondary road driver. I turn into someone's drive and do the three-pointer to hit another street (Pablo) and it's far less congested although it increases my school zone total to three.

2:36: 16 minutes to go two miles, I could've run and gotten there faster.

2:37: Flo has my sandwiches and salads almost done, chicken will take about 10-15 minutes. Fair enough. I grab some paper cups and plastic forks along with two jugs of iced tea. I still have no clue about the significance of the idea, I just remembered that Flo mentioned it.

2:42: Flo brings out my sandwiches and a $15 salad (!!!). WTF. She told me it was 4 something a pound and I CLEARLY said two pounds. Oh well, that's what I get for ordering in a crunch. I'd be a real dick to complain about an extra seven bucks but in hindsight I would've bought a pan and a few salad mixes. Flo realizes that $15 for a big tossed salad should be illegal so she throws in about three bucks in salad dressings.

2:47: Doing the match...$30 for sandwichs, $15 for a salad that I'm thinking might end up in the ice cream freezer, $15 for the wings, $10 for the forks and tea...Damn $70 is a cruncher...So I quickly do some thinking.

2:48: Still thinking

2:49: Maybe I'll slide the salad in the back and place the dressing on top of it so the dopey cashier can't see the price. All she'll see is "Deli NC" for the dressings. So I position the salad and dressing in the appropriate positions.

3:00: Chicken is done, a little late at that.

3:05: Up to the cashier. The real dumb one is three deep so we'll try this girl, she doesn't look like she cares.

3:06: I put the tea and cups on the belt to confuse her and quickly say "I've got two turkey ringleaders." She comes back with "I need you to rip the receipts off of them." And somehow this question tricks me because I go to rip the salad's one off first...D'oh!! Well there went that idea.

3:08: Total comes to 61 something, a little low and after looking at the receipt I see that she failed to charge me for one of the boxes of wings (8 bucks) and the tea was 2-for-1. I don't feel bad about the free chicken because there's no reason for a tossed salad to cost 15 bucks.

3:09: Speed off to work, go through only one school zone, two four-way stops and no traffic lights on the way to work. The food arrives, it was a great bonding moment with my co-workers and everyone had a good time. Plus the office folks had tons of extras to choose from.

And I went to Best Buy later that evening and picked up my K Street DVD. HBO should've never canceled that show, if for no other reason than the fact that I liked it. Oh well I'm having better luck with Entourage (FINALLY an Adrian Grenier/Jeremy Piven project!), which just got re-upped for a second season.



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